Is It Rude to Call Someone Again After Leaving a Voicemail

49 Ways To Say No To Anyone (When You Don't Desire To Be A Wiggle)

Posted July 28, 2016, by Zahra Campbell-Avenell

In life, you take to say no a whole lotta times.

• Practice you want chips with that?
• Come to my granddad'due south future wife's bachelorette political party in the Gold Coast!
• Go a free stress test* (sponsored by the Church of Scientology)
• Desire to subscribe to the Career FAQs newsletter? (Actually, you really should say aye to that one – it'due south awesome.)

I know it's not piece of cake. In fact, sometimes information technology can be then tough to say no that you lot cease upward giving in and just saying yes. It'south man nature – we want to be agreeable, nosotros want to exist liked, and we want to be kind.

So how do you say no, no, no all the fourth dimension without beingness (or feeling like) a jerk? Here'due south the short version: just don't exist a wiggle. You have every right to say no without feeling guilty, and every bit long as you don't do information technology in a nasty way, y'all're not a jerk. Plain and simple. Here's a not bad tip:

Stop proverb yes when y'all want to say no.

And if y'all're not saying no to about things, lemme tell ya: y'all're not doing yourself whatsoever favours. In a globe where everything is finite, you should be prioritising like crazy. Saying yes to everything is the fastest style to fire out. Merely I'thousand not here to tell you why you need to say no (that's for another article) – I'll assume you lot're hither because you want to know how to say it. And that's a whole other story. The adept news is that at that place are many ways to say no (give-and-take on the street is that there are at least 49). So without further ado, let's go into it:

i. Use the word.

Non, 'Non at this time', not 'I don't think then', not 'I'chiliad not certain', not 'Maybe next time'. The word NO is a powerful affair. Use information technology if you are admittedly, unequivocally certain that at that place is no other respond. And don't apologise for saying it. If need be, practise maxim the word until it loses its ability over y'all.

2. Or a business firm (but polite) culling.

• I appreciate your time, but no thank you lot.
• Thank you for thinking of me, merely I have too much on my plate correct at present.
• No cheers!
• Not today, thanks.
• Non for me, thanks.
• I'yard afraid I can't.
• I'm not actually into [heavy metal/decoupage/Pokemon Go], only thanks for asking!
• I'd rather not, thanks.
• I recall I'll pass.

3. Don't Costanza it.

This goes for family, friends, or even your dominate. You don't have to have an elaborately fabricated ruse – just say you don't want to. If you don't want to go to an event considering you've had a rough calendar week and you'd rather sit down in bed watching Netflix – then say then. Don't invent an bilious grandmother because you retrieve it makes your alibi more palatable.

4. Don't become on and on.

In some cases, it's best not to elaborate. If you justify your 'no' too much, information technology tin can seem like you're lying – or worse all the same, information technology tin can permit the asker to find a workaround to try and make you say yes.

5. Don't be afraid to say it twice.

Sometimes people don't respect boundaries, or are used to people caving if they ask again. Just considering someone is persistent, doesn't hateful you lot take to give in. Smiling politely, and say no a 2d time, just more firmly than the first.

6. If demand be, use 'considering'.

Research has shown that using the word 'considering' makes people hold with yous (fifty-fifty if the reason you give them is absolute rubbish). So instead of just proverb, 'Unfortunately I won't exist able to help you plan our team building result', try adding a reason (nevertheless trivial) to help your refusal go down more easily.

7. Just smile and milk shake your caput.

You lot can do this equally you walk abroad, as well. This works particularly well for people giving out flyers or trying to guilt you into signing up for something.

eight. Exist believing.

Information technology helps to imagine that you are the person in control of the situation (mind over affair – it'south a powerful thang.) Make eye contact and speak conspicuously. Don't grumble your no, mmmkay? This is extremely helpful if you feel that you lot are existence taken advantage of.

9. Don't take freebies.

Nosotros're hardwired to desire to reciprocate when someone gives us something. And so if you lot take that cheese sample at the supermarket and the nice lady starts disarming you to buy it, you lot're far more likely to say yes than if yous hadn't accepted the sample in the starting time place.

10. If all your friends were jumping off a cliff, would y'all?

It'due south easy to fall into the trap of proverb yes because other people are saying yes. Don't exercise it.

11. Remind yourself of the opportunity cost.

What will you lose by giving in? Time? Coin? Wellness? Zip comes for complimentary.

12. Read up on the tricks used by con artists.

Information technology makes yous realise how easily fifty-fifty the smartest among us tin can go fooled into proverb yes. Don't be conned.

thirteen. Trust your gut.

Your intuition will seldom atomic number 82 you astray. If information technology doesn't 'feel' right, listen to your instincts – and say no.

fourteen. Provide an alternative.

This can be especially useful in a work setting, when you don't want to be seen as the person who says no all the fourth dimension. If you're too decorated to have on a job that you might want to do in the future, you tin say something along the lines of, 'I won't exist able to aid yous with the Field account this time around, simply I'k happy to take a look next calendar month when my schedule is less hectic'.

15. Laissez passer that buck.

If y'all want to say no to something that you know someone else might want to say yes to, feel free to laissez passer on that information. 'I'thousand afraid that I won't take fourth dimension to contribute to the bake sale this year, but I know Amanda loves baking – perhaps yous could ask her?' is a good example. Resist the temptation to utilize this equally an excuse to throw people you don't like nether the bus, or you will (rightly) be perceived as a jerk.

16. Negotiate.

If you're willing to see halfway, this is the time to negotiate. It'll allow you to adapt the request without saying an outright no. This can include reducing the size of the chore, asking for a longer deadline or sharing the load with another person.

17. Don't filibuster.

There's no bespeak in making someone await for an answer if you know that your reply will be no. Procrastination is a terrible matter – don't say 'I'll think almost it' if you won't.

eighteen. Become ahead and change your heed.

Simply considering you said yes once doesn't hateful that you're stuck maxim yes until the end of fourth dimension.

19. Say it often.

The more you do, the less terrifying it will become. Kickoff saying no to annihilation that doesn't add together value to your life.

20. What a shame.

While saying 'Deplorable, I can't' will certainly soften your message and make it more than polite, it will likewise dilute information technology. Here's another style to say the same thing 'Information technology'due south a shame – I'd dearest to aid merely I'thou already committed to [10 thing]. Best of luck!'

21. The illness to please.

Often nosotros'll say yes to things that really aren't a priority because you don't want people to retrieve you're a jerk. Guess what? Some people will think you lot're a wiggle anyhow, no matter how nice you really are. Then cease worrying nigh what people think, and just say no already.

22. Crystal brawl it.

When you go good at saying no, you can probably kickoff pre-emptively saying no to asks before they come. Call up that your aunt is going to invite y'all to her Tupperware political party? Tell her that you're broke.

23. Avoid serial askers.

If you know someone who is always asking for favours, without doing much for you in return, attempt to avert them, particularly at times when y'all know they volition be in an asking mood.

24. A white lie never hurt anyone.

Ordinarily I'm a huge abet of the truth, but in some cases, you might need to get a little creative with your no. For case, if y'all know that your grandmother is going to try and push her Anzac biscuits on you when yous visit, experience gratuitous to tell her that the medico has told y'all to avoid sugar for a while if you don't want to injure her feelings. If your grandmother's a tough cookie (pardon the pun) feel costless to employ #2.

25. Not at present.

You lot should only do this one if you know for sure that you lot'll actually consider something later (otherwise, see #17). Permit's say that you lot'd dearest to aid walk your neighbour's dog once a calendar week, just not the week before you lot're leaving for a two-calendar month trip to Republic of guatemala. Uncomplicated – ask your neighbour to check with you again when you're dorsum. And when you're at work, unless it's urgent, don't drop everything to attend to the newest task on your list – just say, 'Certain thing, I'll get onto that as shortly as I'g finished with this projection.'

High five, yous're halfway there! Hither are 24 more ways to say no:

26. Information technology'southward not y'all, information technology's me.

Feel free to apply this archetype rejection line if you feel that the product/idea/person/occasion is right for someone, just that someone isn't you. It'south perfectly acceptable to say that something isn't the right fit for yous.

27. It's not me, it's you.

Plow the above axiom on its head, and don't exist afraid to tell people when it'southward a difficult no, aka 'Maybe…when pigs fly'. So if you lot're a vegetarian, don't allow your bully-aunt brand you try 'only a lilliputian seize with teeth' of her beef casserole – tell her, 'No cheers, Aunt Maggie – you know I'chiliad a vegetarian so I will never try it.' Feel free to draw a line in the sand where you need to. Another case is, 'Every bit a rule, I don't donate money to political parties'. If you stick to your guns, people volition learn to respect your boundaries.

28. Understand.

Sometimes validation is all the other person needs. Saying something like, 'I know that sucks – only I can't, I'm sad.'

29. You don't always have to be overnice.

Demand permission to say no just considering you don't want to? Permission granted.

30. Air your discomfort.

If a friend asks to borrow money, feel free to say something like 'I'k not comfy with lending coin to people, pitiful.'

31. I wish I could.

In some cases, you might have to exist a little softer in your approach. Imagine the nicest parking inspector in the world. Even though you tell her that you're only a few minutes late, what'south she gonna say? Probably something along the lines of 'I wish I could, but I've already written the ticket'. Adopt a similar arroyo. Here's another case: 'I wish I could help with your project, but I'm swamped this week'.

32. Thanks merely no thanks.

Sometimes this is literally all you'll have to say. Or yous can add #31 to the mix if you desire to soften the accident. This is what to say if y'all desire to say that you're grateful to be asked, but 10 isn't your matter.

33. Employ body language.

Shaking your caput, raising your eyebrows – even rolling your eyes tin work in the right setting. Regardless, apply powerful torso language to bear witness that you lot mean business, fifty-fifty as you decline something graciously.

34. Buy some time.

I would leave this as a very last resort, because yous do run the risk of being barraged later on. Y'all're only postponing the inevitable, but if it helps, you can say 'Permit me think about it' or 'I'll bank check my calendar…allow me get dorsum to you.'

35. I'm flattered, just no thanks.

Sometimes you lot might need to admit that information technology's a big deal that a person asked you to exercise something. This could be useful if someone asks you to model for them, or offers you a promotion that yous don't want.

36. I really shouldn't…

Salve this for the times when y'all want to say yes, just actually recollect y'all should say no (perhaps to be polite). Then when your colleague (whose boyfriend happens to be a pastry chef) offers y'all some of her birthday block, use this. It's similar magic…say it and the other person is likely to say, 'Oh, become on! Just have it!'

37. Hell no.

This needs to be used sparingly, and probably only with friends. So if you sleep with a Hello Kitty night calorie-free on, and a friend-of-a-friend is invites you to a screening of The Horror III, saying 'Oh heeeeeell no! I'll never sleep over again!' is a safety bet.

38. I said no.

This works for children and pesky, charming salespeople. Again, the key is to be friendly but firm.

39. It's not the all-time.

This is a gentle way of saying no, and tin be actually useful when someone asks you something akin to 'Does this shade of neon orange suit me?' Instead of being a jerk and using a blunt #37, try saying 'It's not the best color on y'all – let's expect at this navy blazer instead!'

forty. Ummm, no (possibly accompanied with a laugh).

So this is the only i that tin can (kind of) make you sound like a jerk, then use it wisely. I would save this for moments when someone asks y'all to work for free, or insults yous in some other way.

41. I know this isn't the answer you were hoping for.

Acknowledging another person'south feelings is important, only certainly makes this a 'no' on the softer end of the spectrum. So if someone is expecting you to exercise something just y'all aren't going to do it, say no, followed by the above gem.

42. Last time was great.

Sometimes you're gonna have to say no when you've said yes before – and this tin be tricky. The best way to get around this (fifty-fifty if you need to harness the ability of #24) is to affirm that while you might have enjoyed information technology the last time, yous may not this time around. 'While I loved the opportunity to present to the CEO, you know that public speaking isn't actually my forte, so I won't do it this quarter.'

43. Let me know if yous want me to reshuffle priorities.

If your boss hands you lot withal another project that y'all don't have time for, and won't have no for an answer, ask what you lot tin can let become of. 'That sounds actually interesting, and I'd be happy to do information technology – but that ways I won't be able to submit the study past Fri. Then allow me know what you want me to prioritise.'

44. I'm expert/I'one thousand happy/I'thousand all set.

This is good for cold callers – 'Thanks but I'g good with my current mobile plan. Delight remove me from your call listing. Cheers!' is practiced plenty.

45. How lovely of you.

If your well-meaning sister-in-law wants to throw you a 30th birthday party, simply you'd rather just have a casual dejeuner with your friends and family, appreciate the gesture while refusing it. 'Janet, that'due south and so lovely of you! But I've already planned to take a beach twenty-four hours and a picnic – I'll be sending out invites next week.'

46. Reduce your availability.

Depending on what you lot exercise for a living (due east.g. if y'all're a medico/plumber/lawyer/mechanic/accountant), any of these can be useful: don't put your mobile phone number on your business card. Don't give out your number to anyone except close friends and family. Encourage people to text you rather than leaving yous voicemail messages. Reduce the number of Facebook 'friends' you have.

47. Unfortunately.

This is good for a business setting. Had a request to recommend an intern who y'all recall should still work at Bakery's Please instead of a law house? I've got your dorsum: 'Hey Ellen, thanks for thinking of me! Unfortunately I don't think I'yard the best person to write your recommendation because I haven't spent enough time seeing you write briefs, which seems similar an integral part of this role. Expert luck in your job search!'

48. It's non possible.

Possible and impossible are magical words. If you say, 'That's just not possible' with conviction, you probably won't need to say annihilation else.

49. It's an accolade.

If someone asks you to practise something major – I'm talking about something akin to becoming their child'southward godparent or 'proverb a few words' at their wedding – just saying no volition make you sound similar an absolute jerk, then you have to tread lightly. Here's a expert leave strategy: 'Charlotte, that's such an honour, and I feel privileged to have been asked. However, because [insert non-negotiable reason here, e.one thousand. I'grand so terrified of public speaking; I've been known to faint], I wouldn't exist able to give this important chore/role the fourth dimension and effort it deserves, and I don't want to permit yous down. Would you consider asking Fatima instead?

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Source: https://www.careerfaqs.com.au/news/news-and-views/how-to-say-no-to-anyone

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